Homestuck.XYZ 2.0

You wake up inside a uhhh, trailer? maybe? wherever you are it is fucking hot in here, like several heat lines hotter than you'd prefer it to be. speaking of you, and what you'd prefer. what is your name?

>Dusty Roads

luigi wrote: ↑

Sat May 23, 2020 6:30 pm

>Dusty Roads

Ah yes now you remember. you are Dusty Roads
named after your father, Dirty Paths
who was named after his father, Mucky Patches... but we don't talk about HIM!

Anyway, Dusty, seems you're in quite the predicament! All this name excitement has distracted you from the heat for now, but if you stay in this trailer too long you're going to bake till you're charred like a college student's first try at a thanksgiving turkey.

how are we getting out of here?

Open the toolboks

luigi wrote: ↑

Sat May 23, 2020 9:24 pm

Open the toolboks

good idea! hopefully whoever owns this has a better grasp of tools than they do of the English language...



hmmm, seems like the standard array of Toolbocks neccesities. Solderers, pliers, The Detonatortm, a hammer, measuring tape, a sad book which looks at you with the somber gaze of a child that has grown up to quickly, a wrench etc.

>Open the book

luigi wrote: ↑

Sat May 23, 2020 10:28 pm

>Open the book

such a moving read. The author of this book explores lots of the real nitty gritty vulgarities of life. The Grotesque, expressed, with such depth that it could make a grown man cry. Trauma, oh, sweet trauma, how you mirror bliss brings a tear to Dusty's eyes.

but you realize you're wasting time... it is getting hotter!

>Check who the author of the book is. They deserve your kudos for writing such a compelling book

>Equip the hammer

>Open the door

luigi wrote: ↑

Sat May 23, 2020 11:17 pm

>Check who the author of the book is. They deserve your kudos for writing such a compelling book

gAH! this HORRIBLE STACK OF CRAP WAS WRITTEN BY YOUR GRANDFATHER MUCKY PATCHES!!!
DAMN YOU MUCKY! DAMN YOU!
the ending left some things to be desired anyway, what a hack!

luigi wrote: ↑

Sat May 23, 2020 11:18 pm

>Equip the hammer

That BASTARD must be who locked you in this trailer!
I guess now you don't gotta be too concerned about some impolite destruction of property

Mandy wrote: ↑

Sun May 24, 2020 1:16 am

>Open the door

RAHHHHHHHHHHHH
You start going OFF on this door
FUCK this door
FUCK MUCKY PATCHES
You are getting SERIOUSLY HEATED
seriously... heat... ed


You splutter awake!
It is hotter than the sun's muffler in here!
you must have passed out from the exertion!

how are we getting out??

>drink that bottle of liquor for insperation

23toedbasket wrote: ↑

Sun May 24, 2020 7:36 pm

>drink that bottle of liquor for insperation

Pretty nice of ol' Muck-o to leave you a bottle of the family's favorite TRIPLE X ALCOOL
You have always felt that your creative cycle was dependent on sustained drunkeness... so you down the whole thing

By taking the bottle you've accidentally gotten the ball rolling slowly, but you've still got time before things escalate... anything else you would like to do before things get extreme?

>Fill the toolboks with TNT to make an improvised shaped charge

Mandy wrote: ↑

Sun May 24, 2020 10:55 pm

>Fill the toolboks with TNT to make an improvised shaped charge

okay. Yeah. You're really, really drunk.
Never in your long, complex relationship with alcool have you EVER done something this MONUMENTALLY asinine.

but hey, that's probably just the TRIPLE X talkin.

you're drunk enough to get the contraption together
but you're way too drunk get it right.
This is not going to end well.

detonation in :

5...
4...
5...
burp...
what?
...
10...

>Put it against the door, hurry!

>Swallow one of the sticks, so you absorb the alcohol easier and don't have as bad of a hangover tomorrow

Mandy wrote: ↑

Tue May 26, 2020 1:00 am

>Put it against the door, hurry!

Oh yeah! shit oh, I uh wait fuck okay. here, here we, here we go. WAIT, oh FUCK!

You are SO drunk. The room is spinning like pizza dough in the hands of an Italian Chef aggressively showing how to correctly spin and toss to a clueless new employee. In a wild, beligerant, and uncoordinated attempt to place the Toolbocks, you end up tripping on something and dropping your IED

luigi wrote: ↑

Tue May 26, 2020 12:50 pm

>Swallow one of the sticks, so you absorb the alcohol easier and don't have as bad of a hangover tomorrow

*uuuuugggghh*

you're not sure exactly what happened last night, but you vaguely remember your last thoughts before blacking out being something about deepthroating dynamite as a hangover cure... you really gotta stop drinkin'

You're not sure whether you tried it or not, but if you did... It. Did. Not. Work. You're hurtin. One thing about TRIPLE X it gets you three times as drunk but also three times as hungover the next day. But hey at least that cool breeze feels nice.

whoa holy shit is that The Detonatortm stuck to your face??? yikes good thing it wasn't the trigger for all this dynamite, which in retrospect seems pretty obvious considering they've all got fuses... I wonder what far off chain of events this has sparked?

wait.

COOL BREEZE???

there's a HOLE over there underneath that BROOM! thank the LORD.
Looks like it's too small for you to fit through, but it's made the heat much more bearable.
Too bad its been replaced by this unbearable headache.
Now what?

>Clean your trailer before doing anything else

>Touch the giant virus cell.