Darkshade

[deadlyAdder]

Something something, you're not mad, just disappointed, etc. etc. Honestly, you don't care much about scolding him.

[deadlyAdder]

You gladly proceed to beat the shit out of Darryl.

[deadlyAdder]

You examine Darryl, who by this point is just laying on the floor pathetically.



What's that, Darryl? You have something to say? Speak up, don't be shy now.

[deadlyAdder]

Oh, that sure sounds like it's troubling you Darryl!! Luckily, you know just the thing to fix it!!!

[deadlyAdder]

Ok. You absorb Darryl into your body mass, which adds something to your meat sack. Not meat though. You don't know what the hell that is.

You got MYSTERIOUS ORB.

[deadlyAdder]

You fail to puke out the orb because it has already assimilated into your body mass. It, like the rest of your body, can now only be removed by outside force. This will likely have repercussions in the future at some point.



Anyway, let's get all this clutter out of the way. HM moves the tubes to the sides of the room. Behind them were two doors, making a total of 3 in the room if you count the one on the opposite wall which is out of the camera's view. But that's the door you came through, so it's not all that important.

[deadlyAdder]

You attempt to open the door on the right, but something seems to be jamming the door closed. Maybe if you could shove something sharp down the side near the doorknob, you could force it open.

[deadlyAdder]

You grab the nearest GLASS SHARD and start shoving it into the doorframe. Maybe if you keep this up for half an hour, it'll open!

[deadlyAdder]

Now THERE'S an idea you can REALLY get behind.


You rush up to the door and start smashing, startling SA a little.


There we go. Nothing a bit of BRUTE FORCE couldn't handle.

[Mirage Xel]

>HM: Be CJ.

[deadlyAdder]

You enter the next room. Looks like it's another anomaly containment cell, although this one has less security than the two of you's old cells, by which you mean it was only locked.

[deadlyAdder]

You examine the document on the small pedestal here. So you guess these things just remain the same brightness regardless of surrounding light level or something? Huh.



SA decides they want to take the left-most flag, and starts tugging on it. It's theirs now.



HM decides it finds one of these flags to look extremely delicious. If HM knew what Oreos were, they'd probably compare the flag to a delicious mint-chocolate oreo.



Yum.

Author Note: Happy pride month yall!!

[deadlyAdder]

You cannot be CJ because CJ is busy being DR. GUN.
So you be her instead.
You have finally made it to the second cafeteria. All the budget went into this room, so maybe you could relax for a few moments while you're at it. Maybe try cleaning your coat. That alien aquatic lifeform you shot dead sure did bleed a lot.

Spoiler

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AB: Hello, Georgia! What a pleasant surprise!

Oh, not this asshole. You know all ABOUT him.

[SC]

> DG: Admire his pristine mug. Just look at its perfect condition!!

[Mirage Xel]

DR G.UN: Peace the hell out of there.

[deadlyAdder]

You've got a vast majority of documents memorized, so you know what the fuck this guy's deal is.

Spoiler

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DOC: First of all, Fuck You.
DOC: Second of all, you can stop with the whole "Everything is Fine" bullshit, because I know for a fucking FACT that this room is never this clean.

Recalled Document

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"Subject 635
Class: Asshole.
Subject 635 is a mammalian entity, 6'9" in height, with a vaguely bovine skull serving as his upper head. Subject 635 is always wearing a suit with sheep wool on the shoulders, and claims that wool comes from the dead bodies of his parents, who he murdered. Apparently. When questioned on how he came into existence, the story changes a lot.
Subject 635 likes to refer to himself as "The Benefactor", although many who have met and/or made deals with Subject 635 like to simply refer to him as "The Bastard".
Subject 635 can produce illusions at will, and is seemingly godlike in power. He molded the doorway of his containment cell like clay, simply because he wanted to feel more comfortable when entering and leaving. Which he does often. We keep locking the door, but he just keeps getting out. Personnel are to be alerted of Subject 635 and are advised to avoid him at all costs.
Subject 635 will often make deals with people he interacts with, and tends to only interact with people who are going through crises in their lives or are struggling. Said deals will more often than not benefit the person with whom the deal is made, but a notable side effect is that once they have those "benefits" they're stuck with them until time of death (Which may or may not be accelerated depending on the deal that is made. Lots of people die because of this dick, is what I'm saying.) One subject who successfully made a deal with Subject 635 had been having marriage problems. Subject 635 offered to help. The deal was made and the person with whom was dealt with went to marriage counselling, and resolved all issues with their husband. Them and their 3 children later died in a car accident that week, caused by a nearby gas station flooding the road with fuel.
When questioned, Subject 635 said that that gas station had been running low on supplies, so he decided to help them."

Spoiler

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AB: ...

Spoiler

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AB: Only trying to make things comfortable, Miss Un.

[deadlyAdder]

Spoiler

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DOC: What do you want?
AB: It's not about what I want, it's about what you want.
DOC: Right. Of Course.
AB: Look, Georgia, you've been stuck in this dead-end job surrounded by people with vastly inferior intelligence for almost a decade. You want an out, and I'm giving you that chance.

Spoiler

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DOC: If you're trying to boost my Ego by insulting my Incompetent Idiot Co-workers, it's not working.
AB: I'm not trying anything, I'm reading your mind. And even if I couldn't do that, I can see it in your eyes and body language anyway. You want to escape. From this place. From these people.
AB: Don't drink that coffee, by the way. it very clearly has blood in it.

[Mirage Xel]

BLUH

[deadlyAdder]

Spoiler

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DOC: What's the catch? And don't even fucking Think of telling me there isn't one.
AB: Well of course there's a catch, but what would be the fun in telling you?
AB: Miss Un, you and I are very much alike. We both thrive on chaos. If you accept my offer, you could be free to cause lots and lots of chaos.
AB: You could even tear thi--
DOC: Stop. Stop Fucking Talking.

Spoiler

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DOC: You and I are NOT alike.
DOC: People like you want to watch the world burn, but you manipulate. You watch from the sidelines while others do the Dirty Work.
DOC: You're a Coward.

Spoiler

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DOC: People like you want to watch the world burn.
DOC: But me?

Spoiler

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DOC: I'm the one who's gonna Burn It.

[deadlyAdder]

You are now CJ.
You have just put out a fire.
Earlier, some guy in a fursuit tried making a deal with you or something. The conversation went something like this:
AB: Hello, CJ. I'm here to make a deal with you. You're experiencing things you want to forget, and I want to hel-
CJ: Huh? oh hey i didnt know they let you wear fursuits in the workplace here, thats pretty cool.
AB: I...
AB: What?
CJ: Huh?
AB: I don't...
AB: I...
AB: Pardon???
CJ: ?????
AB: ...
AB: Goodbye.

It left you thoroughly confused.
What will you do?