Attack of the Airlock Thing!

[Radical Dude 42]

You are HARVEY HOTCOCK, professional MAN OF SPACE. You are currently feeling CHEEKY, as you always do, but with a tinge of WORRY because the ON-BOARD SPACE COMPUTER has alerted you that there's a THING in one of the AIRLOCKS.

You are currently in TELEPORTER ROOM O-7. With you, you have your SPACE PISTOL, your SPACE HELMET, and your SPACE BAR.

What will you do?

[warren]

check to see if youre wearing a shirt

[Sharkalien]

> Hotcock: Find space shirt to cover your weird suspender pasties.

[elmiroware]

> Hotcock: Examine your space bar

[rubs juice]

>Hotcock: Check airlocks. Quick!

[deadlyAdder]

>Hotcock: Disregard previous commands. Live up to your name.

[jooleanmoons]

>Hotcock: Equip space pistol in preparation for potential confrontation.

[Sciencejoe]

>Hotcock: Lovingly examine helmet, cuddling it against your massive chest.

[vanico]

Hotcock: get naked and do a little dance

[boqol]

> Hotcock: Equip space bar for space bar related purposes!

> Hotcock: Equip space bar

god please equip the space bar i want the space bar

[Sokota]

> Hotcock: Aggressively yell at the computer for it to shut up and check the airlocks.

[Darth_Energon]

> Hotcock: combine space bar, space gun and space helmet into the space bargunhelmet.

[warmwood]

>Hotcock: Seduct the computer

[barexamkind]

> Harvey: Examine computer.

[Radical Dude 42]

check to see if youre wearing a shirt

You are without your SPACE SHIRT, as you always are!

(Press R to toggle REAL VISION at key moments!)

> Hotcock: Examine your space bar

Your SPACE BAR (bottom inventory slot) is a smooth rectangular remote that lets you operate machinery on this ship. Its psychokinetic plating allows it to take any input, feel what you want, and then enact that out, when applicable.

So it's pretty much a remote control for everything.

>Hotcock: Equip space pistol in preparation for potential confrontation.

Your SPACE PISTOL is already at your immediate side due to it being in your INVENTORY.

Frankly, you can't imagine where having some sort of separate weapon-only inventory would be useful. It's much less of a hassle to just put all your weapons in your regular, non-discriminant inventory.

Hotcock: get naked and do a little dance

You are already 82% NAKED so you go ahead and do the dance without getting naked.

> Hotcock: Aggressively yell at the computer for it to shut up and check the airlocks.

You yell at the ON-BOARD SPACE COMPUTER (OSC) to shut it despite it not making any noise.

OSC (which, for reference, is an Artificial Intelligence, but you already totally knew that because you are a MAN OF SPACE and not some total fool) reminds you that the THING in the AIRLOCK was in AIRLOCK Z-9.

You shudder in spine-chilling fear because Z-9 is the mythical cursed letter-number combination in SPACE LORE. This truly must be some kind of omen. Oh, wait, no, it's not Z-9, it's T-9. Never mind.

>Hotcock: Seduct the computer

You're not familiar with seduct the computer!

[barexamkind]

>Hotcock: Smooch the Computer.

[Sharkalien]

> Hotcock: Examine weird space age soda fountain.

[TC]

> Hotcock: Pretend that you can breathe in space. If you can breathe in space, there's no need for airlocks. And if there's no airlocks, there's no monster in the airlocks!

[Darth_Energon]

> Hotcock: type: "5318008" and look at it upside down

[Cole]

> Hotcock: Find space shirt to cover your weird suspender pasties.